The Geste of Sir Sweet Bear

CHORUS

Sir Sweet Bear, Sir Sweet Bear.
Sing now the legend true.
She vanquished all her mighty foes
and dragons overthrew.

Once there lived a little girl,
and Sweet Bear was her name.
The town of Wooded was her home,
and from that town she came.
She asked her mother to point the way
to Camelot, for she could not stay.
She rode to Arthur’s court that day
to win renown and fame.

She said, “I am the noblest born
from here to far Araby,
so knight me now, Sir Arthur King,
and do not tell me maybe.”
“I will not knight you,” replied the king.
“Whoever heard of such a thing?
Unless you prove yourself to me,
I will not knight a baby.” 

“If you defeat Sir Amava,
I’ll knight you in my hall.
For in his castle dungeon deep
he holds my knights in thrall.
A guard, a dragon, a narrow way,
if you can pass them, there you’ll decay.
No one escapes his gates, and now
I hear your mommy call.” 

Young Sweet Bear rode to the stony keep
and clattered on the gate.
“You cannot pass,” the porter cried.
She said, “It’s not too late.
I’ll cry so loud that the walls will sigh,
the peaches fall and the barley die.”
The porter said, “The gates are wide:
now you have sealed your fate.” 

In the castle court she froze in fear,
too terrified to speak.
She saw a dragon breathing flame,
with scales green and sleek.
The dragon reared to attack his foe,
then turned to flee fast as he could go.
With paw on nose, he fled because
her diaper held a reek. 

No window and no door she found
into the tower strong.
She found a key amid the dust,
but where did it belong?
And then she saw through an iron grate
a sewer passed where there was no gate.
She was so small that she could crawl
the culvert foul and long.

Within the keep, the captured knights
were longing to be free.
A keyhole gleamed by algae light
and opened to her key.
“You cannot leave!” shouted Amava,
but she replied, “Ga agaba da!”
“What can that mean?” he asked in fear.
“Is it a curse on me?” 

And while he thought with eyes fast closed,
the knights slipped out of sight,
and from Sir Amava’s wide land
they fled by day and night.
At last they came to King Arthur’s hall
and told how Sweet Bear had saved them all.
King Arthur dubbed her then and there,
and Sweet Bear was a knight.